Don’t speak before we speak too much

It’s nearing the end of May, and I’m feeling more unsettled than usual. Normally, I would suppress this feeling and brush it off as normal anxiousness. This time, the difference is that I am unable to confront this problem head-on, and it’s scaring me.

Bring me back to the times I had so much fun, despite the stress that everyone was facing. There are so many ‘should have’s. It all comes down to regret. The promise that I made to myself about not having regrets…. has already been broken. For now, I just wish that it is possible to salvage the situation. At least, let my efforts be enough. Life may not be a smooth-sailing journey but there are no obstacles that are impossible to overcome.

This month has been rather fulfilling in a sense. I still have a stable income from my job, and I have been going back for training sessions with the juniors because it is honestly so lovely to see them improving. This might be the first ever batch of juniors that I am so attached to but I am more than glad to see them grow. I sprained my ankle and missed out on two training sessions but I’m back and I cannot wait to continue seeing them in action. Also, I have been catching up on my driving theory test after the several failures of my evaluation because I got complacent, or rather, cocky, and decided not to study for it. I put in slightly more effort and I got full marks for the basic theory test! So I am going to apply for my provisional driving license very soon so that I start on my practical lessons; can’t wait to actually start learning even though the next available lesson, I heard, is in August. Other than that I have also been continually catching up with my closer friends online and offline đŸ™‚ All in all, I have mostly been feeling alright. I cannot say I feel ‘fine’ because apparently, ‘fine’ is not a feeling and it makes people think you’re hiding something from them, so here goes, I have mostly been feeling alright. I guess these are the kinds of things I’d want to read when I come back to my old posts, so here it is.


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Of sunshine, positivity & oximoronic writing. I'm 19 years old this year. I created this blog with the intention of ranting and also to become a hipster but it has brought me nowhere. So here I am, hoping that people enjoy what I write. I never thought I would be sitting here and hoping that someone reads my blog and is actually inspired by it, but I sincerely wish that everyone who stops by will enjoy what I write, especially if it's relatable.

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